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Tame your inner critic and start living

We all have stories we tell ourselves. It’s up to us to choose which ones to believe. As Henry Ford famously said, whether ‘we think we can do something or think we can’t – we are usually right!’ 

The stories we tell ourselves

When our inner critic speaks, it says things like, “I’m not good enough”, “I’m always messing things up”, or “It’s never going to work”. And your inner critic will always talk to you in your own voice or one that’s criticized you in the past.

How often have you had a thought that is brave, daring or out of your comfort zone – and a voice inside you has quickly found an excuse? “I can’t because I don’t have the time”, or maybe, “I can’t because I don’t have the energy!”

Many of us have limiting beliefs or paradigms that can stop us from taking a big step. That may apply to our relationships, at work, in health or even relating to money and time. The danger is, if we listen to these excuses, our negative thoughts take over, and we end up believing our own stories are our truth. 

“The irony is that we attempt to disown our difficult stories to appear more whole or more acceptable, but our wholeness – even our wholeheartedness – actually depends on the integration of all our experiences, including the falls” Brené Brown.

Own your own story

Before I invested my life-savings to train as a life coach, my inner critic was saying, “Who would ever pay you for advice?” and, “Who do you think you are to be a life a coach?” If I’d listened, instead of following my dream, I could easily have talked myself out of it and not done my training! Stayed right there in my comfort zone.

We need to get honest about the stories we are making up and challenge our own thinking. If we determine what’s true, and what’s self-protection – we can see what we need to change to get better results. 

But what if I could?

So the next hear your inner voice saying, “I can’t because…”, stop giving that thought airtime and ask yourself, “But what if I could?” 

Tune into why you want to do it. Ask yourself, “What would my best self-want me to do at this moment?” or “What would the part of me, that isn’t scared do?”

Just recently, I spoke on stage to over 150 people. A week before the event, my inner critic was telling me, “You can’t call yourself a speaker”, and “You aren’t up to this – stop putting yourself through the pain!”. Instead, I chose to tune out and listen to my inner coach. I told myself, “You will be as prepared as you can be, stand in YOUR OWN power and do the best you can. No one can do better than that.” 

Believe you can 

Your inner critic will try and frighten you out of it, but it’s up to you remember who is driving! Embrace the fear, listen to your inner coach, and tell yourself, “Here I am standing in my power, I am going to be in this moment, and do it anyway.”

Each time you take a small action towards a dream or a goal, you start to believe that you can. Your confidence grows and you can build on that moving forward. Before you know it, you’ve listened to the part of you that says you can do it and you’ve done it! 

If you want the confidence to own your own stories, book yourself a free 30-minute chat here; www.vickyevans.com/booking

I’ll help you start moving your life towards the future you were meant to live!

Believe you can until you do!

Vicky